How to Co-Parent with A “F*#k Boy” Holiday Edition

Do not “Pop-Off” on your child’s parent this season!

Well it’s that time of year again! The time of year that some baby daddies/baby mommas start “actin’ a plum fool.” Yep, you guessed it! The holidays bring out worst and best in people. The “F$#k Boys” are out in full force this season. A few months ago I introduced the concept of Co-Parenting with a “F#$k Boy” in a prior post. Now that I have your attention, let’s explore exhibit A. A as in Arenas! Yes, the one and only former NBA star, Gilbert Arenas. He is back at it with his bitter tactics just in time for christmas. Do fools ever take time off?

Exhibit A

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He recently won a child support case against his ex, Laura Govan, which resulted in a decline in her monthly child support payments. In order to celebrate his court victory, Arenas resorted to publicly humiliating the mother of his children on social media.

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I can not imagine co-parenting with Gilbert Arenas. In fact, I do not want to think about the situations Laura Govan has experienced with this “F#$% Boy.”  He is very toxic person. Gilbert Arena’s “F#$% Boy” tendencies would drive any reasonable mother to the brink of insanity.

If you are dealing with “co-parenting fuckery” this festive season check out the following 5 tips:

  1. Don’t Step off Your Throne

If you are dealing with a blatantly disrespectful co-parent don’t go down to their level. Boss Up! Maintain your integrity and don’t entertain foolishness.   I admire Laura Govan for not “clapping back” on his petty ass.  It would be hard for me to maintain my composure if I was in this situation. She is keeping a cool and calm attitude. This is best technique to use for this scenario. Sometimes the best response is no response. Don’t let a toxic person contaminate your spirit.

2) Don’t Loose Sleep Over Coins

Don’t be surprised if you have to cover the majority of all holiday expenses. Some people can be very selfish during the festive season. Gilbert Arenas, had no problem taking the mother of his children to court two weeks before Christmas. He is about the “savage life. ” Did he stop to consider the court cost she will have to endure? Did he consider lawyer retention cost or  paperwork filing fees ? Did he take into consideration the financial effects his actions will have on her Christmas budget? I could go on and on. I am not indicating Gilbert Arenas will not buy his children Christmas gifts; but he has made it virtually impossible for his ex to do any last minute shopping.  This is a form of financial abuse because in a way he is dictating how she spends her money. Nobody wants to be inundated with court fees. As Sweet Brown would say, “Maaaannnn, aint nobody got time for dat.” However, if you find your self in financial bind this season, remember Christmas is only 1 day. Don’t beat yourself up if you can’t afford everything on their Christmas list.

3) Keep Smiling

Karma will catch up to that “MoFo” someday!

angel

4) Take a Time-Out

if you feel yourself becoming overwhelmed by the events going on in your life, don’t be afraid to FREEZE! That’s right stop dead in your tracks and just breathe. Yes! It’s so important remember to take a breather. When we neglect to clear our minds from mental stress, it builds up. The last thing you want to do is SNAP. When you feel as though the very walls around you are about to cave in, just take a “time-out.” Take a walk, drink a cup of  tea, read a book, meditate, do yoga, listen to classical music or find a quite place and sit in complete silence. Once you loose  control of your temper, you loose the battle. You officially, let the other person “get to you.”

5) Explore your Spirituality

It’s very important to maintain spiritual balance when dealing with toxic individuals. It’s best to limit the amount of negative energy you encounter on a daily basis. In order to strengthen my spiritual core, I pray for peace and protection. Sometimes prayer is the only answer to things we don’t understand. In fact, I will never fully understand why some people feel its completely “okay” to be violent, hateful and wicked towards the parent of their child. If you have a child with someone, you should  treat them in a dignified way. You don’t have to like your child’s parent but you should show respect.

Images courtesy of @no_chil_gil and blackamericaweb.com

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